Ahk!

This is not a recent photo

but it is most definitely 

the most accurate representation

of my current emotional state.

You've been forewarned.

This post is solely for my own documentation of this lovely (sarcasm) little time of transition in life. I move in roughly four days, but really have less than two to prep. And I have packed exactly zero things for this impending move. Also I'm trying to spend time with all of my friends before I leave and coordinate plans with my family for graduation and and and a million other little things that crop up.

Despite my always sunny outlook it's not all bad, though. Actually it's mostly good. But here at Appropriate Emotional Responses R Us I  have been getting annoyed at people when I know that I'm really only sad to be leaving them and laughing when I should be crying (some day I will fill you in on my inaugural Les Miserables viewing). True story: one day I needed to cry reeeeaal bad, just to let it out and I couldn't. Could. not. make. myself. cry. Even though I knew it would make me feel better. I shamelessly resorted to watching a clip of Pride & Prejudice to get the tears flowing. Nobody said I was sane. Fortunately I don't think (I hope, please dear God) I have acted on those annoyed feeling because I am well aware that they are straight cray.

I am also on the board of directors (yes, I feel like a five year old wearing Mom's heels with her lipstick smeared all over my face) for this awesome organization and have been 100% scatter-brained and dropping the ball left and right this entire year, even though I care deeply about it. I was at one point in my life incredibly organized. Now I'm about as organized as this post and I don't know how I got here but I kind of miss it.

And continuing with this well-organized and thought-out post, I don't do well with transitions (in life or in writing, apparently). And my school draaaags this one out for two full weeks, which is really nice because it gives us time to hang out with everyone, take a day trip into Boston, and attend the reception our school president hosts with--hello day drinking!--an open bar at which he comes and talks to you about your life plans after an hour and a half and you keep your mouth firmly shut and let the other people around you do the talking because at that point you are very very tipsy and lord knows what gems you would drop....which is all good and well and wonderful and absurdly privileged but I would say that I am beyond ready to have a little semblance of a routine or really any sort of normalcy. Something about grass being greener or something.

I'm going to wrap this one up, recklessly publish it, and then go do something with my life.

Cheers,
C